skydiving big

picture taken after "big accident." That's me in the tan jumpsuit with the red helmet.

Here are the four most common questions I ever got about skydiving....and my answers:

Q: Why would anyone jump from a perfectly good airplane?

A: There is no such thing as a perfectly good airplane. Especially a “jump plane”


Q: How come you started skydiving?
A: Cause I wanted to fly. And meet guys.

Q: If I go up in the plane to watch the skydivers jump, and there’s an emergency,
how will I know if I have to jump or not?
A: If the pilot goes out the door, I advise you to follow him.

Q: I went on that parachute ride at 6 Flags, and it made me sick. Does it really feel
like that?
A: No – I hate that ride at 6 Flags – makes me wanna vomit.

There is no feel of falling in freefall – I always liked calling it “freeflying,” cause I don’t like falling! But there is no feel of “falling” not like when you jump out of a tree or off of a roof (yup, did both). In freefall, you’re too high up, too far from anything big enough for you to register movement against. Hmmmm…..still confused, eh?
Okay, time for another APj stroll – or in this case – fly, down memory lane:

I was very excited as the plane climbed: they were going to let me “close” last. Since there were only a handful of us women on the drop zone, we often became a novelty – “Just go out there and hold a heading. We’ll fly to you,” was the norm. But the four of them were going out first (2 on on the strut, 2 on the step) and I was gonna “bombout” the door. Cool!!!!
So we’re on jumprun, everybody is climbing out and into position, “Eat, Fuck, Skydive!” (Hey, its’ more clever than 1-2-3-go!), and off they went.
And the plane lurched a bit.
--and I lost my balance
--and fell back in the plane
--just a little bit.
But enough to put me REALLY far away by the time I recovered!!!! “Shit!! I’ll never catch em!” I berated myself. Pulling my arms in, and streamlining my body, I became a bullet in the sky. I was screaming through the sky at 120MPH. “Hmmm, maybe I’ll catch them after all…..”
Quickly, I saw that I was approaching the now-completed four-way. But I couldn’t believe what I saw. “Shit! Why are they spinning?” How could they do this to me? How am I supposed to dock if they won’t stop spin—“
About 20-30 feet away, I realize that --
I am flying at 120MPH towards them.
As a screaming corkscrew.
THEY are not the ones spinning.
The spinner is ME.
I frantically “get big” to slow my speed and stop my spiral. I slide 180degrees around the circle. And dock.
We smile, kiss pass (yup, just like it sounds), wave off, track away and pull.

On the ground, one of the SkyGods came over grinning and waving, “AirplaneJayne! Bitchin’ approach! You looked so hot!!””

Uh-huh. I never did tell him that I didn’t mean to do it. Why spoil a good thing?